"She dreams in color, she dreams in red ..."

Another cloudy, rainy Saturday. But I'll be damned ... it's the LAST Saturday in February! Unless the next 3 days drag on forever, I'll be happy to admit that this particular February did not last six months. Nice.

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Yesterday, I went first to the hair salon at Dogwood Acres. The beautician (can't bring myself to actually call her a hair stylist) was there, cutting a man's hair. I explained my situation, telling her that Grandma needed a shampoo, but didn't want to come unless I was with her. She said she'd be happy to wash her hair as soon as she was finished with the man she was working with. (That sentence sucks, sorry.)

Grandma was sleeping when I got to her room. I woke her up, and told her that Christa was going to wash her hair in a little while. She seemed ok with that, and said she wanted to go to the bathroom. Into the wheelchair, shoes on ... bathroom. She wants the light off and the door open. I have no explanation.

After she finished and washed her hands, Christa showed up. We grabbed the White Rain shampoo ... the only one Grandma will consider using ... and headed down the hall. Christa was great with Grandma ... asking her about her family, and telling her how beautiful her hair is. After the wash, she asked if Grandma would like a little trim. Grandma first refused, but then (with very little coaxing) agreed to let her "clean up around her ears".

Here's my favorite snippet of conversation from the hair salon:

Christa: "Where were you born, Mrs. F?"

Grandma: "GEORGIA! And I guess I'm going to have to swim back there, since no one will take me back."

Christa: "Why do you want to go back?"

Grandma: "Well, everything I have ever owned is in Georgia, everything I have is there, everything I want is there ..."

Me: "Grandma, I'm not there!"

Grandma: "I'm taking you with me."

Heehee.

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Her roommate is still sick, and on oxygen. Her daughter came in while I was there yesterday and seemed a bit upset that no one had noticed that her Mom had been running a fever, until she came in and saw her Mom's face was beet-red. She asked them to take her temp, then a chest x-ray ... that's when the pneumonia was found. I wonder how long her Mom would have been without a diagnosis if she had not been coming in every single day to check on her. How could they change her briefs, reposition her in the bed, bathe her ... and not notice her fever??? Grrrr.....

And I hate to even type it out, but Grandma had a gurgly cough yesterday. I added her name to the "Doctor Book", so that the doctor can check her out on Monday when he makes the rounds there. Also alerted her nurse, although I'm not sure they will do anything. We'll see how she sounds when we get over there later today.

And speaking of beet-red, Grandma F wants all of us to eat more beets. They build your blood, don't you know.

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Oh oh! I forgot the best part. While we were in the hair salon yesterday, Grandma said she thought she would like for Christa to come and get her once a week so she could get her hair washed. I said, "You mean whether I'm here to go with you or not?" She said ... drumroll please ... "You don't have to go with me. I will let her come and get me."

People, it's the small miracles that keep me going. :-)

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Paula Deen has finally cooked something I wouldn't eat. I love to watch her Food Network show "Paula's Home Cooking". She's southern, and genuine ... and her oldest son is drop-dead gorgeous. Anyway, she is famous for adding butter to everything. And if it doesn't have butter, it has bacon grease. So I'm pretty much used to the fact that almost all of her recipes are as unhealthy as they can be. Unhealthy, but tasty. I have two of her cookbooks, and have enjoyed several of her fattening recipes.

This week, however, I was horrified to watch her make what she called "Bill Nicholson's Krispy Kreme Bread Pudding with Butter Rum Sauce". Oy vey, y'all. I love sugar. I do. But this made my teeth ache, and then I got lightheaded and sick to my stomach as I watched Paula take a bite of her creation.

Americans, as a whole, have gone loop-the-friggin-loop (thank you, Shirley Valentine) where food and portion sizes are concerned. We eat too damn much. We eat too much sugar. And, for the most part, we're growing wider every year. After watching Paula make this mess on her show this week, I'm thinking there's no end in sight. I wonder how many people in her audience made this diabetes-inducer for dessert this week!

I'm adding the recipe to this atrocity so you can be nauseous with me ... NOT so you can run to the kitchen to make it. Mm'K?

Bill Nicholson's Krispy Kreme Bread Pudding with Butter Rum Sauce
2 dozen Krispy Kreme donuts
1 (14-ounce) can sweetened condensed milk
2 (4.5-ounce) cans fruit cocktail (undrained)
2 eggs, beaten
1 (9-ounce) box raisins
1 pinch salt
1 or 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
Butter Rum Sauce, recipe followsPreheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Cube donuts into a large bowl. Pour other ingredients on top of donuts and let soak for a few minutes. Mix all ingredients together until donuts have soaked up the liquid as much as possible.

Bake for about 1 hour until center has jelled. Top with Butter Rum Sauce.

Butter Rum Sauce:
1 stick butter
1 pound box confectioners' sugar
Rum, to taste

Melt butter and slowly stir in confectioners' sugar. Add rum and heat until bubbly. Pour over each serving of Krispy Kreme Bread Pudding.

(Oh, the insanity.)