"I don't wanna do your dirty work no more ..."

Another warm and muggy day in November. I demand Fall.

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I'm in the middle of doing 2 loads of Grandma F's laundry. Yesterday was her laundry day, and I set the hamper out by the door as usual. Today when I got there, the basket was just inside the door. I assumed it was clean and ready to be put away until I opened the plastic bag. It was still dirty. Grandma said "they" just put it back in her room because "they" don't have time to wash clothes, since "they" are so busy washing all those tablecloths and cloth napkins. I'm figuring she either got confused and pulled it into her room as she returned from a meal, or she did it on purpose. She was complaining that the detergent they used had stretched out a pair of her new panties, so maybe she just wanted me to do it. Hellifiknow ... all I know is, I'm doing this week's laundry.

Things discussed during the Care Plan meeting:
*Grooming: The nurse is planning to talk with Grandma F, and to do so sternly if necessary, about her hair and nails. Her hair is not being washed, and it's because Grandma is refusing during her shower time. She is wearing the same clothes for days at a time, and the nurse added to the Care Plan that she should receive prompts from the aide to wear something different every day. Also, to discourage Grandma F from cutting her own hair, she suggested we tell Grandma that's it's against the rules for her to have scissors of any kind in her room.
*Breakfast: Again today, Grandma asked me to see if they could bring her a cup of hot water and a doughnut every morning. The nurse said the fee was $2 per meal, per day for a tray to be delivered. (If a resident is ill, they can have a tray delivered for up to 3 days at no extra charge.) Anyway, the nurse warned of the possibility of Grandma F wanting ALL meals in her room if we started doing breakfast. And we don't want that. She suggested getting a small (2 cup) hot water dispenser for her room, so she could make tea in the mornings. It's allowable only if it has an automatic shut-off, but I shopped online today, and found one. I'm still not sure it would be safe for her ... she spills things quite easily, and of course, she can't see very well. Gonna think on this one for a while. She is going to tell Grandma about the availabilty of fresh fruit in the dining room every morning, and that she can walk up there to get what she wants for her room every day. I buy her 9 to 10 bananas every Thursday, and by Monday night they are GONE.
*Dementia: The nurse suggested we visit the doctor to talk specifically about her mental issues, possibly getting an order for a psych evaluation. She said her dementia may have progressed to the point that she could benefit from the Alzheimer's drug Aracept (sp?).

This morning, during our visit, Grandma F told me, once again, the entire story (start to finish ... it took about 15 minutes) of the All Powerful ID Card. She said someone had come into her room to take a "survey", and she refused to say anything to them. Because that card meant she didn't have to.

She also told me about the "Killer Flag". For Veteran's Day, the home had hung a flag from the doorway of the dining room. She said everybody was so worried that the flag was going to fall on them. They were all relieved when the maintenance people took it down today. She said she tried to tell Jimmy all about it when he was there, and he argued with her, trying to tell her that a fabric flag couldn't hurt you even if it did fall on you. She said he was so hard-headed, she couldn't make him understand the danger. I told her that he got that hard head from her.

Oh, my nerves.

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Just for the record ... that yard man next door was still on a mower at 6:30 PM yesterday. That's 6 hours, y'all. I figure he's getting paid by the hour.

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Leaving today, I noticed a hard hat from one of Jimmy's jobs had fallen to the ground ... and I noticed it just as the garage door was closing on it. The door stopped, and then wouldn't close again, because a wheel popped off the track. Still waiting on the repair guy. Hopefully this will cost less than replacing the $spring$.

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I'm almost done watching the last season of "The Sopranos" on DVD. (I think I'm the only person in America who never watched the series when it was on HBO.) Now I'm wondering how I'll manage without my weekly dose of Tony. Hurry up Season 6, will ya?

"Her dreams went out the door when she turned 24 ..."

All the windows are open at the castle today ... so warm for mid-November. The neighbor's yard guy has been mowing and/or blowing (in other words, MAKING NOISE) for the last 4 hours, I kid you not. How is that possible? The lot is not that big. Grrrr. "English, motha*!*^#&. Can you speak it?!!?"

Me = Bad Neighbor.

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Grandma F was semi-perky this morning. She showed her bossy side when I combed her hair. "Comb it harder. But not too hard like those other people." Ooooh K.

I have an appointment in the morning with the head nurse to re-assess her care plan. It seems they do this every 6 months. I am leaning toward asking them to start delivering a breakfast tray to her room every morning. Today Grandma said she was going to ask them to bring her a cup of hot water and a doughnut every morning. Don't know where that came from. I have asked her several times if she would like them to bring her a tray and some hot tea for breakfast, and the answer is always "no". Now she wants a doughnut every day? Anyway, I'll talk to the nurse and possibly give that a trial run and see how it goes.

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Paul McCartney is on "Ellen" this afternoon. He said he'd be turning 64 years old soon, and may have to consider changing the lyrics to his song "When I'm 64" to "When I'm 84". He said 64 seems young to him now. He's still pretty darn cute for an old man.

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Nothin' much else going on around here today. Feeling gray like the sky, and in need of sleep. I slept last night from 2 AM to 4 AM. Not quite enough, what do you think?

"I wanna talk about me ..."

Clemson 35 - Florida State 14
Not much more to say after that, is there? :-)

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Em was in the ER this morning, hopefully by now the new pain meds have kicked in. She wasn't feeling too spry earlier.

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I can't believe it's almost holiday time. Feels like it'll take a miracle to pull it off. But I guess it feels like that every year.

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The Friday Five
(on a Saturday, I'm a rebel)

1) What is your favorite noise to hear?
Laughter in my house, or the sound of rain ... just as I'm falling asleep.

2) If you could live in any era of time, what would you choose and why?
The 1950's ... Valium.
Aww, I'm only kidding. Clothing and decorating styles were so cool back then. I sure would miss my laptop, though.

3) You just found $50 while cleaning your house. Where do you decide to spend it?
First of all, I'm cleaning my house? Huh?
But if I did find $50, I'd buy something new to wear. Seems like everytime the weather changes, I have 2 halfway-decent outfits. The rest is what I refer to as "happy clothes" ... only suitable for lounging around the house with a bottle of wine.

4) What magazines to you subscribe to/read on a normal basis?
Don't subscribe to anything myself, but I gravitate toward "People" or "Us" in the doctor's office or grocery line. Hollywood gossip is one of my addictions, don't ya know.
Jimmy subscribes to "Popular Mechanics", which couldn't be more boring. And while we don't know who paid for it ... I suspect Jimmy's employer ... we get a local society magazine. That one helps me keep up with what Biff and Muffy Greenville are doing.

5) If you could witness any event in history, but not change anything about it, what would you choose and why?
Ending on a sad note, but I would love to go back to March 29, 1994 ... the day Daddy died. I wish I had said more to him those last few hours in the hospital, instead of just standing there by his bed and holding his hand. But I guess that'd be changing things, wouldn't it? I suck at these stupid questions.
OK, I'd like to go back and witness Woodstock. I always wanted to be a hippie, but I was only 10 years old in 1969.

"How long till my soul gets it right? ..."

Worked in the yard a bit this morning. Leaves for sale.

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Grandma F wasn't feeling too well this afternoon. Tummy Troubles. We'll just leave it at that.

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Made chicken and dumplings for dinner ... seemed like the weather was right for it. 'Twas good.

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Clemson vs. Florida State tomorrow. Kickoff is at noon. ESPN. Go Tigers!

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I'm a woman of few words tonight.

"All my best memories come back clearly to me ..."

The cat is blitzing around the room ... what a goofball.

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I spent money today. A visit to Publix for Grandma F's snacks, then to Target, Sam's, and BiLo for us. I forgot to get vanilla ice cream, and I meant to get tequila ... so another shopping trip tomorrow. Blah.

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Grandma F was sitting on her sofa, still in her pajamas (inside out) when I arrived there at 11 AM today. Never a good way to start our visit. She did say today that she didn't know what she'd do if I didn't come and see her. Aww. I told her she'd just have to rely on the aides there a lot more. (Always thinking, that's me.) She told me Michael called her after they got in from their cruise. Cruise? I just let it go, but if I find out that Michael and Patti went on a cruise and didn't invite moi, they have some splainin' to do. But I bet Dr. Dementia told her they went on a cruise, and he's always making stuff up.

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I was thinking the game on Saturday was only Pay Per View ... but I misheard the news guy when he said NEXT week's Clemson-USC game won't be broadcast on a network. So ... Yay for televised Clemson football this weekend!

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Saw my boy Adam twice today, which was a very nice thing indeed. He was wrestling his drumset down the stairs and into his truck, and then a reverse trip with it all. I wish we had a better place to store those drums of his ... someplace that wasn't so hard to get to. We could get a NEW HOUSE!!! (Why didn't I think of that before?)

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Jimmy's flying in tonight. I need to hose down the bathroom before his plane lands. Just call me MissProcrastination.

"Oh think twice, it's another day for you and me in paradise ..."

Today was "Cover Your Roots" day here. This was my 2nd visit to this salon. Just before the wedding last month, I was so pissed off at the stylist I had been using for a few years, I just up and called someone new. The old stylist had taken to dying my hair as close to black as it could be without actually being black ... which grew on me. I had sorta gotten used to that. But then the last 2 times I went to her, she cut my hair all one length ... like Jimmy would do, when I let him trim my hair. I felt like I was in elementary school. I told her, on the visit a week before the wedding, to please add some layers back in. So I came home with black hair and no layers. (I know this is a long, boring tale of my hair woes ... but you don't have to read it.) Anyway, 3 days before the wedding, I chose the New Sylist ... let's call her Marge, shall we? She did a great job trimming my hair that day, explaining that the length I was using was just calling attention to The Chin. But she said she didn't want to make any major changes right before the wedding.

Cut to today (no pun intended!) ... she lightened things up with highlights and a lighter brown all over. Then the scissors started flying through the air. Y'all, I'm now Melissa Etheridge's older, fatter twin sister. Marge is sorta hyper anyway, but I remember watching her cut my hair at one point ... while she was talking 90 miles an hour, laughing at her own jokes ... and wondering if she was just gonna keep cutting once she reached my scalp.

Actually, it would be a cute haircut on a normal-sized person. I think it just looks a bit wierd on top of this particular mountain.

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No visit to Shady Acres today, although I was treated to a phone call this afternoon, detailing her afternoon in the bathroom. Why me?

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I think I must have jinxed the Paolo family last night. They were "the last team to arrive". Here's another thing though ... the Weavers? The "Christian" family that calls all the other teams names and laughs at them behind their backs? They are giving lions all over the world one more reason to eat Christians. Damn, they work my last nerve.

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Will Madonna singlehandedly bring back disco? God, I hope not.

"Now I ain't sayin' she a golddigger ..."

That's the song guaranteed to make me smile these days ... and dance when no one's looking.


Record high temperature in Greenville today ... I think it was 79 degrees. Yes Virginia, there is a Global Warming. But after almost 3 weeks, we have new grass! Can't believe I'm so excited about fescue, but after an entire summer of almost-NO grass ... well, this makes me happy. Who knew when I paid the yard guy to put down weed killer last May that it would kill the entire lawn?!? (Only those who have lawns made up entirely of crabgrass and clover will get the joke.)


Today at Shady Acres, there was a special command performance of some Baptist church's handbell choir. I got there about 15 minutes before they were to start, so I started hinting around the minute I walked in her door. She refused immediately, said she wasn't a "music lover". I countered with the idea that we would only stay for 10 minutes or so. She pondered that ... and AGREED! We got to the dining room after they had already started, found an empty spot next to her table-mate Millie, and settled in for some mighty fine handbell music. Only this was so very different from the beautiful brass-sounding bells I have seen on TV. There was a line of about 20 well-dressed Baptist senior citizens, each holding 2 brightly colored bells. After the director started the CD player, he would hold up cards with different colored circles on them, and the corresponding colored bell players would shake the holy hell out of their bells. And they were miked. Oh, my ears. They played "Feliz Navidad". Twice. I know Walmart is decorated for Christmas already, but please. They played a few hymns, and tried to end with "How Great Thou Art", but the CD player stopped working. Bottom line ... Grandma F stayed for the entire thing, and afterwards ... we went outside and sat in the sun for half an hour! It's a miracle, I'm telling you. This lady has refused to leave her room for over FIVE months ... and in the place she lived in Georgia, she was the same way. Maybe next time, it won't be so hard to convince her to try another activity. Well, one can always hope.



"Amazing Race" is 2 hours tonight. The NY Paolo family is growing on me. I think those boys, especially that older one, need a good whomp up the side of their heads for talking to their Mama the way they do. I never thought she'd make it this far ... and I don't think she did either. I love the way the Dad attacks Phil with a giant hug every time they come in first place. (Mainly I just love Phil.)

"Time goes by, so slowly ..."

I feel like I've been in the car all day long. Went by Shady Acres to see Grandma F this morning. She spent the entire hour I was there in the bathroom. TMI, already. Oh well, it gave me time to change her sheets (after the aide stopped me on the way in and said, "I tried to change your grandmother's sheets this morning, but she told me that you do that for her." ~sigh~), wash her dishes, scrub her table, and pick up all the tiny pieces of trash off the floor. Then I sat on her sofa and watched "The Price Is Right". Good times.


In the afternoon, I drove Em to the doctor for a "procedure". She went in for a bit, then came out with a prescription for Valium and Lortab. Damn, some people have all the luck. (Only kidding.) The doctor wanted her feeling "high" before the procedure. So we drove to get the medicine, then drove back to the doctor. An hour later, she had lived through it all, and we drove away with yet another prescription for an antibiotic. Poor girl, she had a rough afternoon. But she did score a doctor's note for work and school ... day off tomorrow!

Speaking of the girl ... Em turned 23 on Friday. I remember being 23 with complete clarity, so it's really hard to reconcile in my brain that my BABY is 23. Ah well ... the circle keeps turning.

Hope your "Year of 23" is the best one yet, Miss Emilie.

I think that's about it for this Monday. Gonna watch "Wife Swap", take a shower, and conk out.

"Beverly Hills, that's where I want to be ..."

Major progress today at Shady Acres ... exciting only to me, and possibly my husband. Grandma F actually WENT OUTSIDE in her wheelchair, and we sat in the sun for about half an hour!!! I think she enjoyed it, and saw for herself that there were no "dope fiends" sitting out there on the front porch. (She loves to tell me that when you have people sitting around smoking cigarettes, there are bound to be "dope fiends" around in the same place.) So I pushed her in her chair, all around the front area, looking at the flowers. Then we sat in a sunny spot, read her weekly letter from a friend, and talked to passersby. Not a dope fiend to be spotted. Maybe she'll want to go again tomorrow ... cross your fingers.

It was 70 degrees, and she wore a scarf over her ears, along with her heavy sweater. I don't care!!! She was out of her room!!!

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Went to Walmart today. Survived.

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I looked at the calendar today and choked on my own spit. There are only a few weeks between now and Thanksgiving! I need to get the house (and myself) ready for The Visit*. I guess I'll go down to get her sometime during the week of Turkey Day. Small beans to some, but constant company is hard for folks like me who actually enjoy alone-time.

(* My mom's annual month-long stay at my house.)

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I saw country singer Mindy McCready on Oprah today. Geez Louise. Proof that a little bit of stardom and a video on CMT does not a high self-esteem make. Her "boyfriend" has beaten her to a pulp more than once, and she still loves him. And she's pregnant. *sigh* I'm tellin' you, people need to have to pass a "common sense" test before they can conceive a child.

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I was bringing in a half-gallon of milk this evening ... almost had it safely in the garage fridge. Then I dropped it. Now there's a half-gallon of milk in my shoes (which I left, draining, outside), on my pants, and all over the garage floor.

So yeah, I'm off to change clothes now.

"The rest is still unwritten ... "

Jimmy just called to say he's been assigned to a new project. Usually when one project comes to an end, as the one in Puerto Rico is doing, he comes home and begins work - eventually - on another one. Then on some future date, he travels to the project site to work. This time, it seems the powers that be have decided to keep his Frequent Flyer Miles active. He'll leave Puerto Rico the week of Thanksgiving, and the very next week, be working in Minnesota. So much for "home for the holidays".

Fate just wants me to have more alone time with Grandma Ford. That's all.

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One of Jimmy's favorite sayings is: "Change is good." With that in mind, I invite you to join me in my new home. And don't laugh at me while I try to figger out how the new door-locks work, 'k?

http://agedtoimperfection.blogspot.com/

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"I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned
No one else can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins"

(From "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield)

New Home

Hello.

I'm not entirely new to the whole blogger world. I've read other people's online journals and blogs for years. I even kept a little LiveJournal going for a couple of years while my kids were away at college as a way of keeping in touch. It was fun to express myself in that way. I stopped writing there over a year ago, when some major life trauma was happening with my daughter. And I just never picked it back up again. Well, actually I did write an entry last night ... but after such a long hiatus, it felt right to look around for new surroundings.

So here I am. Wondering if I am computer-savvy enough to do this with no help ... already knowing the answer to that is "no". Wondering if anyone will read the rambling thoughts and daily goings-on of a middle-aged housewife ... already knowing the answer to that is "the same people who used to read my LiveJournal, except Kay and Beth won't because they don't have a computer anymore". (Wondering how anyone functions in this day and time without a computer!)

I'm 46. I have 2 adult children. My son, age 25, is married to his college sweetheart. My daughter, 23 on Friday, lives here at home while she finshes up her education. My husband and I will celebrate our 27th anniversary next month. In all my life, I have never held a job that one could consider "making a living". I think that makes me feel very unworthy. Also, like I was born in the wrong century.

My proudest accomplishment in my life is the fact that I raised two really wonderful human beings. Although, I do realize that I can't really take full credit for that. They are who they are. And I am just blessed to have been allowed to hang around while they were growing up. Those were my favorite years ... so far.

Well, I'm going to use this place as I did the old one ... a place to document my days. Boring as they may be, they are mine and I love to look back at them as time passes. If someone comes along to read it all, that'd be OK too.

See ya.

"I just want you to know ..."

Don't faint. It's me. A prize* will be awarded to the first one of you who notices. (*The word "prize" is used to describe a big smile from me, and maybe a hug when I see you.)

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Let's see ... what's been going on since mid-2004? In no particular order:

1. Hayley the Devil Cat was, humanely and with many tears, put to sleep last November. There was something wrong with her brain, and it just wasn't safe to live with her anymore. I hope she forgives me and is living somewhere without pain.

2. We did go on that cruise in May of 2004. Brought home lots of good memories and pictures. Would love to go again one day, when a buttload of money shows up.

3. "Miss Daisy" passed away in July, 2004. Rest in peace, Betty.

4. Emilie graduated from Clemson in May, 2005. Yay, Emilie! I can't believe I am the Mama of two college grads.

5. Adam and Brandy married last month. It was a beautiful wedding. I was proud that I never once did the "ugly cry" during the ceremony like I thought I would. It went by so fast, I'd like to go back and live that weekend all over again. Happy memories ... and I have a daughter-in-law now!

6. Jimmy's grandmother moved to an assisted living home here in Greenville. I wrote that like she made the choice on her own. Ha. She most assuredly did not. She dreams of returning to Georgia every night, I'm sure. Jimmy has been working in Puerto Rico, so she's been basically my responsiblity since she got here in May. I'm getting used to her. She may never get used to me.

7. We got a new kitten in July, 2005 ... a sweet little Ragdoll named Miss Maggie Belle. Smelly Cat for short.

8. I joined Weight Watchers in November, 2004. I lost 35 pounds. Felt incredibly better. Then in January, Jimmy left for Puerto Rico. That's right, it's all his fault I'm no longer losing weight. It makes sense in my head.

9. I got the Dyson vacuum. It's great ... and I use it just as rarely as I did the old one.

10. In December of 2004, Emilie and I drove to Pennsylvania. She was a bridesmaid in her roommate's wedding. I have good memories of that little road trip.

11. Adam got a good job in April, 2005. I think he enjoys his days. I know he enjoys a regular paycheck.

12. Uhhh. So yeah, it's been quiet. Something may come to me later, and I'll be sure to record it here for posterity.-----Gonna try for a nightly update from here on out. Hold me to it, will you?

"And she'll have fun, fun, fun ..."

Wow. I'm surprised I remembered my password to get in here.

They say it takes 21 days to make or break a habit, and it's been well over 30 days since I've written here. It was easier not to. And now of course, there's far too much to catch up on in one entry. So I shall start fresh, and assume, since you probably know me, you know what's been going on since early April! Whew!

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We went last weekend to good ole Columbus GA to see Miss Elizabeth graduate from high school. I was stressing a little before we left, wondering if Emilie would make it ... she's been feeling SO bad lately. But she did just fine. My mom threw a little party for Beth after the ceremony, and we enjoyed seeing everybody!

Speaking of graduations, my baby-child Adam wore a cap and gown at Clemson's graduation on May 7th. Me <----- PROUD. What a nice time we had! We cooked out and drank beer to celebrate ... and did that for the whole weekend. And now he's engaged. :-) Brandy took Adam on a congratulations cruise after his graduation, and he surprised her with a GORgeous diamond ring. Now I'm going to be a MOTHER-IN-LAW. I'd like to take this opportunity to assure my family that I will be a MARVELOUS one.

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So now ... I'm getting a bit nervous about the work that needs to be done before we leave for our cruise on Thursday. I'm so very disorganized! In fact, today I should already be out the door getting the final errands run. And I've picked today to start updating the journal again. Ha. Procrastinate much?? After seeing the pictures Adam and Brandy brought back from their cruise, I am REALLY getting excited about the whole thing!

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Things To Do Today:

*Take packages to the post office

*Go to PetSmart to buy automatic feeder bowls for the cat

*Figure out how much cash to take on the trip

*Get cash

*Shop for "fancy" jewelry for the trip

*Do some laundry

*Iron Jimmy's dress shirts

*Pay cell phone bill

*Decide, once and for all, what I'm wearing on the cruise

*Sweep the kitchen

*Watch American Idol and The Real World

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Yikes. What am I doing sitting here?!?

"The more I grow, the less I know ..."

Hi.

First of all, to reply to Sister Kay's comment from my last entry (8 months ago) ... A Dyson vac is AWESOME. That's all I can say. And it costs as much as most awesome things cost. I want the purple one, just in case you're shopping later.

Same ole, same ole going on around here. Except Jimmy is home this week. Right now, he's "checking" my work on the taxes upstairs. Which means that my "background music" is the sound of his grumbling and mumbling, with the occasional "I'll be DAMNED!" thrown in for good measure. Ahhh.

Here's a quiz thing (I love quiz things) I saw on Robyn's journal:

Do I Remember

When John F. Kennedy was shot (Nov. 22, 1963) No, I was four years old. And considering the fact that my parents never even told me I was going to have a baby sister (when I was SEVEN years old), I'm fairly certain they never shared this tragedy with me.

When Mt. St. Helens blew (May 18, 1980) Only vaguely. I was in my fifth month of pregnancy, and we lived in a tiny little town north of Columbus, GA. I remember watching the news reports, but not much else.

When the space shuttle Challenger exploded (January 28, 1986) Definitely. I was at home that morning, with the TV on for company. The regular programs were interrupted to show the launching, since this flight was so newsworthy ... a "regular citizen" was part of the crew. I remember the cameras kept focusing on the faces of her parents as the launch got underway. It's the face of her mother, as she sees the explosion in the sky, that I will always remember.

When the 7.1 earthquake hit San Francisco (October 17, 1989) I don't remember this as clearly as I should. I do remember the news reports of the overpasses and bridges crumbling.

When the Berlin Wall fell (November 9, 1989) I was amazed.

When the Gulf War began (January 16, 1991) I had two children in elementary school, and I was busy, busy, busy with my volunteer work. It seemed like something very far away, and I felt safe in my world. Until a friend at the kids' school (the assistant principal) told me that her own son was over there fighting. That was the exact moment I had a personal realization of just what war means.

When OJ Simpson was chased in his white Bronco (June 17, 1994) This happened only a few months after my father's death. I was in Columbus, with the kids, at my mother's house. We had been working hard for days to get ready for a yard sale, and we had sort of collapsed in front of the TV that night. I wasn't really sure what was going on at the time, but it wasn't long before EVERYBODY knew.

When the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City was bombed (April 19, 1995) Again, one of those days that the TV was on to keep me company around here. I watched the news all day, and cried.

When Princess Di was killed (August 31, 1997) Oh, how I loved Princess Di. It was late on a Saturday night, and I was deep into an insane AOL addiction. Which means I was awake, online, and sloshing around in a wine bottle. I remember running back and forth to the TV in my bedroom to hear the latest on the car crash. And then the reports came that she was dead. It was surreal. A few days later, I cried my heart out as her funeral was broadcast on TV. The sight of her sons walking behind her coffin ... all the flowers that were tossed at her passing hearse ... Elton's song "England's Rose" ... going on seven years later, it's still one of the saddest things I can think of.

When Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold opened fire on their classmates at Columbine High School (April 20, 1999) Horrifying. My own two children were in high school. I watched as the story unfolded, crying for the parents ... and the kids.

When Bush was first announced President (November 7, 2000) I was sad that something that seemed so messed up could happen in a country as "orderly and organized" as the USA.

When the 6.8 earthquake hit Nisqually, WA (February 28, 2001) Well, I feel terrible. I don't remember this at all.

When terrorists destroyed the World Trade Center (September 11, 2001) Of course. I was driving in my car to a job interview, and the radio announced that a "small plane had just crashed into the World Trade Center" ... at the time, I thought it was an accident. By the time my interview was over, the second plane had crashed ... and the reports were clear that this was no accident. No small plane either. I rushed home to the TV, where I watched the rest of the day. Hell, I watched TV for days afterward. Jimmy called me from work that day ... he was at some seminar somewhere and they had no access to a TV. He called to find out just what was happening. I remember saying, "Oh my God, the building is collapsing, and there are still people in there." I remember Emilie calling me that night, and telling me she was scared. I remember the skies with no airplanes for days. I remember not being able to wrap my head around the number of people who were trapped in those buildings. I remember the faces of the people running through the streets of New York. Oh yeah, I remember. :(

"You want it all, but you can't have it ..."

Every time I hear that song, I remember a certain summer at the beach house when all I wanted in the world was a "conversion van". God. To me, it was heaven on earth to imagine the four of us, traveling in style down the highway, in our cushy seats ... watching a VHS tape. Whoo hoo! Anyway, sister Laura (fortified by our usual breakfast cocktail of vodka & whatever else we could find) started singing that song, only she changed the words ... and now when I hear this oldie-but-goodie, I hear Laura singing, "You want a conversion van, but you can't have ittttt". We thought it was hilarious, and it went on for months ... as did all our drunken humor. (Boooots!)

I bet you're wondering what I'm dying to have these days, aren't you? I thought so. You'll probably be shocked to find out that the object of my desire is none other than a VACUUM CLEANER. Go ahead ... laugh. Everybody knows I rarely clean anymore. But I've got such a hankering for a Dyson vacuum, I can hardly stand it. Problem is, I have a hunch that I'd buy it, use it a few times ... and the thrill would be gone. Ain't that the way it always goes?

----------

My birthday was nice ... thank you for the Happy Birthdays. :-) I heard from everyone near and dear to my heart, and Brandy even took me out to dinner. I had crab dip, and flounder stuffed with crab and shrimp. And then I was stuffed. Literally.

----------

Hope everybody enjoys the upcoming weekend. Do something to pamper yourself ... because you mean the world to me!

"It's my birthday too, yeah ..."

I know the date is burned onto your brain, written on all your calendars ... but I just wanted to remind you that tomorrow is my birthday. Yup. 45-freakin' years old. Halfway to 90. How did this happen??? *sob*

Because I've seen others with online journals do the same, I'd like to suggest ways YOU can celebrate my big day. :-)

How To Celebrate Dawn's Birthday(which is tomorrow, so get busy)

1. Promise to de-clutter every room in your house ... tomorrow.

2. Call your pet "Hayley" for the day. Follow your pet around and croon "Hayley-pooooo" until it gets annoyed and runs away with its ears laid back.

3. During a semi-important meeting or phone call say "I don't know. We should ask Dawn what she thinks of that."

4. Wear Birkenstocks.

5. Watch "All My Children", and talk back to the characters. Cry when Erica realizes what a bad mother she's been.

6. Change your computer wallpaper to a picture of me.

7. Call your significant other "Ya freakin' goof" for no particular reason.

8. Postpone cleaning the house for another week.

9. Eat a piece of bakery cake with yummy lard icing.

10. Take a really hot shower ... so hot that you come out all red and wrinkly.

11. Perform a random act of kindness.

12. Out of the blue, tell someone "It's Dawn's birthday today. She's 45, but she doesn't look a day over 24!" (A harmless little birthday lie never hurt a soul.)

Don't you dare forget to leave a comment telling me what you did!

There's somethin' about the southland in the springtime ..."

Well good grief. Two weeks went by without a journal entry here. I honestly don't know why time insists on flying the way it does.

I'm on the "big computer" now, as the laptop acquired some sort of spyware/wormy/virus thing last week. I'm too skeered to use it until it's rebuilt, so I'm back at the desk, using a real keyboard and mouse again.

----------

Last week was Spring Break at Clemson ... Emilie and I planned a little trip to Charleston. And I'm sooo glad we did. We left on Tuesday and returned on Friday, which was a nice amount of time to see some sights, shop a little, and even walk on the shore of Sullivan's Island. I enjoyed all of it ... but mostly I enjoyed the time with my baby girl. And now I know the secret of how to spook the hell out of Emilie: put on a pair of old-fashioned black granny boots and stand outside the bathroom stall when she's in it. ;-)

Getting around downtown Charleston involves finding a parking garage and then using the feet God gave you. We walked ... a lot. It had to be good for me. Of course, the secret would be to KEEP WALKING now that I'm home again. Uh huh.

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Sunday was the first day of spring. And Sunday night, the wind blew and the temps were in the 20's! But the leaves are peeking out, the jonquils are blooming, and the days are getting longer. I'll be sweatin' in no time.

----------

Back to work tomorrow. And that's enough said about that.

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Thought For Today:

"The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, nor to worry about the future, but to live the present moment wisely and earnestly." (Buddha)

"Some people call me Maurice ..."

Well, we had another weekend in South Carolina. Jimmy and Adam set up a working computer at the desk, so I can finally work on the taxes. I don't trust this laptop to keep me online long enough to post this journal entry, much less to file the taxes. So now I have no excuse. This week will be "Tax Week". And after that, "FAFSA Week". Yippee!

----------

Soon after I got back home today from taking Jimmy to the airport, the noise started. Never a good sign. Seems our across-the-street neighbors finally got tired of their exhausting leaf-disposal routine every fall. And I'll be damned if they didn't have FOUR huge trees in their front yard murdered. Bastards. Walking out to get the mail this afternoon, I noticed their house felt a lot closer to the street ... and it's not as pretty as it was yesterday.

Chainsaws and woodchippers ... that was my excitement for today.

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Outside My House Today:

High: 59

Low: 37

Sunny

"All I know is you're my favorite mistake ..."

I've been sleeping with the bedroom windows open this week ... and I'm here to announce that I will not be sleeping under my new down comforter year-round. HOT. There's not much worse than waking up with a "glow".

The weather should be a little cooler next week, and I'm in the minority of folks who are all for that!

-----------

Got my hair cut today. Much better.

-----------

Jimmy called from the office 2 hours ago to tell me he was on his way home. Uhhhh. Yeah.

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Survivor:

I have to say that I felt sorry for Sue. It was obvious that what happened with Richard really bothered her on a deep level. I felt bad for her ... it looked like real emotional pain.

But I had to laugh when I saw Jeff's face after Sue yelled at him. He was NOT expecting that.

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Friday Five:

What was...

1. ...your first grade teacher's name?

Mrs. Spiegal, and I remember NOTHING about her. If she's still around, I guess she'd be in her 70's now. Weird. Oh my God, my MOTHER is in her 70's now. I feel way too old.

2. ...your favorite Saturday morning cartoon?

The only cartoon I actually liked was The Roadrunner ... and Daddy had a lot to do with that. He loved that show, and would usually watch along with us, laughing louder than anyone.

3. ...the name of your very first best friend?

We fought almost as often as we got along, but my first best friend was Sabrina Webb. We still talk on the phone every few years. And I ashamed to say that the reason I don't go to visit her (she lives 2 hours away) is that I don't want her to see how fat I've become.

4. ...your favorite breakfast cereal?

Quisp! I don't remember eating a lot of cereal before 1972 or so ... before that, we ate a lot of oatmeal.

5. ...your favorite thing to do after school?

We'd always have to change to "play clothes" after school ... what we did after that, I have no idea. Play? When I was a little older, I used to CRAVE the time when I could lay on my stomach across my bed and read. Yeah, I was a wild child.

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Outside My House Today:

High: 71

Low: 61

Cloudy

"Where have all the cowboys gone? ..."

Lately it's a really big effort to get groceries bought around here. When it's just me at home, I can scrimp by on what's been in the pantry and freezer for years. But every other weekend, the man comes home ... and I try to cook something fresh. That's just the way I am. Anyway, I am just so very tired of the whole grocery store experience. 25 years ago, when I first got married, I shopped once a week, like clockwork. With my $30 per week budget, I made a list and stuck to it. Even when the kids were home, I was pretty regular about it. Although the budget was a bit (ahem) higher.

So I said all that to say this: When I finally do drag my fat ass out to BiLo to shop for food and supplies, it pisses me OFF to find out they don't carry canned Iams cat food. That means I have to make a special trip to Publix later. And no, the crazy cat won't eat Whiskas.

-----------

Speaking of the cat, this morning I caught her in her newest warped behavior. After biting off a huge chunk of canned food (Iams, you know), she ran with it into the den, where she dropped it on the CARPET and proceeded to nibble daintily. After I yelled "CAT!" and grabbed it from her, and told her in no uncertain terms, that her nasty smellin' cat food belongs in her dish ... she did it again. Only this time she ran upstairs with it. Apparently the atmosphere in the breakfast room is just all wrong. Damn cat.

-----------

Survivor night! I can't wait to see Sue scream and yell at Jeff Probst. I hope Jeff can calm her down though ... she's quite scary.

-----------

Hoping to see at least one of my kids this weekend ... BOTH would be better. :-)

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Outside My House Today:

High: 76

Low: 54

Mostly cloudy

"Can you hear the drums, Fernando? ..."

Oh yeah, I'm hating me some LiveJournal right now. I typed a whole entry offline ... and OH! It was funny stuff. (It was!) So you probably already guessed the rest.

I signed online, clicked the "update journal" button.

*poof*

Grrr. GONE.

And yeah, usually I "copy" it when I finish, just in case. I remembered that I hadn't done it today the same split second that the "error" page appeared.

And now I don't feel like telling it all over again. Bah.

---------

Brief recap:

Cleaned the upstairs.

Gonna clean the downstairs.

Called the phone company about the damn static-filled phone line.

Paid bills.

----------

GRRRRR again.

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Outside My House Today:

High: 71

Low: 54

Mostly sunny

"I'm alright, don't nobody worry 'bout me ..."

Today was a workday for me. (1 or 2 out of every 7 seems to be my routine ... don't hate me, I'm not making any money like this!) I arrived at "Miss Daisy's" house and was met by her creepy daughter, who informed me that, from now on, "Miss Daisy" wouldn't be joining us on our days out. (Sigh.) The daughter is a cheerless, grumpy soul, and I was sad to hear that I won't get to hear her Mom's stories any more. Also that's the end of eating lunch out, since the daughter never mentioned a lunch break ... we started at 10 AM, and I dropped her off when it was almost 6 PM. So now I have the "hunger headache" that I always get when I skip a meal. Not that my ass can't take a few skipped meals. I just always get a headache that won't go away until I sleep.

----------

Tonight's Entertainment:
American Idol
Real World

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Outside My House Today:
High: 68
Low: 55
Light rain

"No shirt, no shoes, no problem ..."

Yeah, it's snowing. I guess it started about 7 AM, but then it stopped midday, and the roads all got a lot better. But now it's coming down again. I measured 4 inches on my deck just now, and it's coming down sideways, the winds are so strong. I always wish my Mom could be around when it snows ... she gets so excited about how pretty it is. And it is pretty when it's falling. The road in front of my house is white again, my driveway too ... so you know I won't be going out tonight. (Said as if I go out a lot anyway. Ha.)

I missed a haircut appointment due to the snow today. Have to wait another week. Drat.

----------

Emilie called me last night as she was leaving a concert on campus ... she said she heard sirens and saw smoke. Then the whole thing was right in front of her ... a 3-story student apartment building right across the street from campus burned to the ground. She said it was a most incredible and shocking sight ... the flames so high in the sky, they were visible for quite a distance. Two hours later, the firefighters were still working ... the high winds last night made the fire so much worse.

Today, over 100 students have lost everything. One girl on the news said, "I didn't lose a lot, because I didn't have much. Just pictures. My pictures. But I did get my stuffed animal when I left." Oh gosh, that makes me cry. Thankfully NOT ONE student was even hurt.

----------

The Bachelorette:Why, oh why, did Meredith tell Matthew that she would "be honored" to get a ring from him? Man, that made me so mad when she ended up choosing Ian instead. Matthew stayed so classy, even with his huge disappointment ... I hope he's got girls lining up for him back in Texas. I think she picked the wrong guy. But then again, she never called me to ask what I thought.

----------

Whoooie, the snow is really flying out there. Let me go look out my window and pretend I live on the coast of Maine. See ya.

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Outside My House Today:

High: 44 (at midnight)

Low: 29

Snow!

"I can say anything crazy ..."

The snow is coming! The snow is coming!

Here I sit with no milk in the fridge, and only half a loaf of bread. And I call myself a Southerner.

"They" say we'll have 3 to 6 inches by the end of the day tomorrow. And "they" sound pretty positive. But as always, wait and see ... this year "they"'re about 0 for 4 in predicting winter weather madness.

(I would like to take this moment to remind my loved ones to use the good sense God gave you, and stay off the roads if you can.)

----------

Serious question: What the HELL is that Quizno's ad with the floating rodents with birth defects all about? Is that supposed to make me want to run out and buy a sub sandwich? Because all it really does is cause a slight gag reflex, and then I have to change the channel! I swear ... they are absolutely haunting, and I totally don't understand the advertising brains behind it. Hell Hamsters singing, "We love the subs! 'Cuz they are good to us. The Quiznos subs. They are tasty, they are crunchy, they are warm because they toast them. They got a pepper bar!" ... Oh yeah mmmm, I'm starvin'!

----------

OK, I guess that's it for today. (Yawn.) I have to go and set my VCR ... The Bachelorette is 2 hours tonight and will run right over The Newlyweds at 10:00. I have to tape one or the other, you know.

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Outside My House Today:

High: 50

Low: 42

Cloudy

"I wish the real world would just stop hasslin' me ..."

Today I didn't stay online all day researching cruise stuff. Nay. Instead I stayed online all day researching hotels for the night before the cruise leaves.

The big confusion for my brain is this: some of the nicer hotels in the area offer "cruise packages", meaning basically that they allow you to park your car at their place and they will provide a shuttle to and from the pier. And that means we could save the $70 charge for parking at the pier. My "research" is proving that only the more costly hotels offer this service for "free" ... the cheaper places offer shuttles to the pier for a fee.

BUT ... I did find a Comfort Inn and Suites that have a cruise package for less than $100 a room ($89.95 to be precise). They are 2 miles from the pier, while the closest hotel offering a free shuttle costs $119 a night. Anyway, now I'm trying to decide. I'm assuming it's safe to leave your car in a hotel parking lot for 7 nights.

Decisions, decisions. And I haven't even STARTED thinking about clothes yet. Oy.

----------

I was a bit disappointed in the Big Fat Obnoxious ending. What a line of crap came out of Steve's mouth at the end! How the Coys demonstrated "what family is all about" ... loyalty and togetherness and acceptance and blahdeblah. Because I sure didn't see that. I saw 2 brothers and a sister who were way too involved. I know I threw a few temper fits when my sister married her brain-damaged second husband and all ... and yeah, I was doing vodka shots at 10 AM on the day of her wedding, just to get through the ceremony ... but WHY would they give that much of a damn who their sister marries? It's not like they were going to all live together.

Now parents ... that's different. Parents have expectations and protective instincts and such. So I completely understood the parents' solemn faces. But when they showed Randi's brother CRYING at the wedding because he didn't want it to happen, well it just plain made me shiver. I know for a fact that Adam would never try to stop Emilie's wedding plans ... even if she married an 84-year-old man just for the money. He might privately say to me, "What the hell?" ... but he'd never threaten to not attend the wedding in protest. Because adult siblings just don't have a say in what happens in each others' lives. Period.

Whooboy, I'm gonna miss those Coys.

And no ... I'm not watching Fox's newest wedding reality crap with the "little person". Frankly, midgets give me the creeps. As in nightmares. *shiver*

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Outside My House Today:

High: 57

Low: 44

Cloudy

"It's something unpredictable ..."

Geeeez. The time spent away from here just flies. I'll try to be better about coming here to write about nothing. Promise.

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So little is happening in my tiny world. Even my thought processes have slowed. Zzzzz.

I spent 98% of my waking hours online today, reading and reading about cruising. We paid a buttload of money to Carnival Cruiseline to show me and Jimmy, Emilie, and Ms. Beth a great time in late May. The more I read about it, the more impatient I am for late May to hurry up and get here.

In case anyone cruising with me (or anyone else I love who's cruising in May *wink*) wants to read and learn more, here are a few good websites to peruse at your leisure:

http://www.cruisemates.com/
http://www.cruisediva.com/
http://www.cruiseclues.com/

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Time for the last episode of "My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance". I must watch.

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Outside My House Today:
High: 51
Low: 35
Cloudy

"How's the world treating you? ..."

Oh, hi. You still here?

Sorry it's been so long. I was thinking I could make a bunch of excuses, like how I've been busy with doing laundry or organizing my CD's or updating Quicken or sitting on my ass watching the new TV. You want more excuses? I've got dozens.But truthfully, the reason I'm not updating regularly is that I'm still barely surfacing. Depression keeps tripping me up lately, always does that in the winter months. For 40 plus years, the gameplan has been "Fake It Until It Feels Better" ... so I guess that's what I'm trying to do.

------------

So yeah, I decided to throw a whole bunch of Christmas money at this guy who works at Tweeter, and then he helped Adam and Jimmy load a huge TV on the back of Jimmy's truck. Of course they had to go back and get another one, because I changed my mind about the one I wanted on the way home from the store. But really all that matters is ... now I can sit out at my mailbox and watch TV. No kidding. This thing is humongous. Bad part is, I'm used to it already ... and the TV in my bedroom (29-inch screen) seems too tiny to watch. (Spoiled, I think they call it.)Jimmy shopped around for a home theater system to go with the new TV, and bought this supersonic Sony thing ... only decided he didn't like the way the DVD's and CD's load into it. So he'll be returning that for another one next time he's home. I haven't used the DVD player/stereo system part of it at all -- I'm stuck watching CMT ... MTV ... All My Children ... Driven: Jessica Simpson ... The Bachelorette -- you name it, I'm watching it. And now I can actually read football and basketball scores. :-)

-----------

Adam's truck died. We think it'll be raised from the dead for the right price though. Meanwhile, he's tooling around Clemson in my car. I told you having a one-day-a-week job made sense. Heh.

----------

Supposed to be a rainy, cold weekend around here. At least we're above zero. I'm feeling for all those Northeasterners. 8 below in Boston tonight. Now that's cooler than being cool. ICE COLD! (Ahem.) Speaking of the weekend, Nick and Jessica will be hosting Saturday Night Live this weekend ... FYI. I watch way too much TV, I guess. Oh well, it's better than staring at my fingernails.

----------

I have just about finished putting all our CD's in notebooks. It feels great to get them all together in one place, and out of all the various racks in one room or another. Current count: just under 600. Including Milli Vanilli. Girl, you know it's true!

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The Voice Within

Young girl, don't cry

I'll be right here when your world starts to fall

Young girl, it's all right

Your tears will dry, you'll soon be free to fly

When you're safe inside your room you tend to dream

Of a place where nothing's harder than it seems

No one ever wants or bothers to explain

Of the heartache life can bring and what it means

When there's no one else

Look inside yourself

Like your oldest friend

Just trust the voice within

Then you'll find the strength

That will guide your way

If you will learn to begin

To trust the voice within

Young girl, don't hide

You'll never change if you just run away

Young girl, just hold tight

And soon you're gonna see your brighter day

Now in a world where innocence is quickly claimed

It's so hard to stand your ground when you're so afraid

No one reaches out a hand for you to hold

When you're lost outside look inside to your soul

When there's no one else

Look inside yourself

Like your oldest friend

Just trust the voice within

Then you'll find the strength

That will guide your way

If you will learn to begin

To trust the voice within

Yeah...Life is a journey

It can take you anywhere you choose to go

As long as you're learning

You'll find all you'll ever need to know

You'll make it

You'll make it

Just don't go forsaking yourself

No one can stop you

You know that I'm talking to you

When there's no one else

Look inside yourself

Like your oldest friend

Just trust the voice within

Then you'll find the strength

That will guide your way

If you will learn to begin

To trust the voice within

Young girl don't cry

I'll be right here when your world starts to fall

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Thought For Today:

"Life must be lived forward, but it can only be understood backward."

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Outside My House Today:

High: 53

Low: 45

Sunny and windy

"Lately there's been too much of this ..."

Brr.

----------

Last night I talked to my friend Sharon. She's out of a job again. I could hardly believe my ears when she told me that she'd been "let go" by that freakin' B1g L0ts. Also, she told me that the manager had resigned, and they had fired about 20 people. So there. I don't feel as guilty for quitting that one. I really liked the manager ... hope he's found something else to do. Sharon hasn't. She's in bad shape. She might come over later to use the computer here to do some searching and applying online.

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"The Real World - San Diego" started last night (don't smirk at me, YES I watch too much TV) and I was surprised to see a pretty young priss from Anderson, SC is one of the seven roomies. She's a student at Tri-County Technical College, where my very own firstborn was enrolled for one semester several years ago. Anyhoo, I was totally getting into the whole drama of their first few days in the (as usual) gorgeous house on the water. A few of them drank themselves silly on the first night ... anyway, I was dismayed to hear our hometown girl (Cameryn, or something like that) go into detail about she "doesn't like YANKEES". And she ain't talking about the baseball team. Later on in the show, I said "Whoo hoooo!" when she appeared wearing a Clemson t-shirt ... and then I yelled "nooooooo!" when she bluntly tells everyone that she brought her vibrator with her to the house. Oh yeah! Make your Mama proud, girl.

-----------

Speaking of Clemson, I don't believe I have given mention of the Tigers' BRILLIANT performance in the Peach Bowl on January 2nd. It was soooo fun to watch as they won 27 - 14 over Tennessee. And if the refs had been doing their job, they never would have called back one of Clemson's touchdowns, and the score would have been even higher! It was a perfect ending to an incredible season ... and I can't wait until August!

----------

Hope the first day of classes went smoothly for my kids ... I was thinking about you today!

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Thought For Today:"The good, the bad, hardship, joy, tragedy, love, and happiness are all interwoven into one indescribable whole that one calls life. You cannot separate the good from the bad, and perhaps there is no need to do so." (Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy Onassis)

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Outside My House Today:
High: 39
Low: 19
Partly cloudy

2003 in Q&A

1. What did you do in 2003 that you'd never done before?

Passed a state board exam; quit 3 different jobs; got highlights in my hair; came ->this close<- to giving up or having a nervous breakdown, whatever you want to call it.

2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

The only resolution I made last year was about money. I wanted to be in less debt at the end of the year. And no thanks to me, I think we are. Yeah, I've made some more for this year ... they're at the bottom of this entry.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

No.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No. But the death of a co-worker's daughter hit my husband and me like a ton of bricks.

5. What countries did you visit?

Give me a break, I haven't left the southeast.

6. What would you like to have in 2004 that you lacked in 2003?

More money; serenity; weight loss.

7. What date(s) from 2003 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

I can't think of any.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Not many achievements for me lately, so I'll just say it was making it through that silly CNA course I took. I had so little confidence in myself ... just the fact that I stayed with it until the end was a miracle.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Realizing that I was probably never going to work as a CNA, and that I had wasted all the money spent on that course was 2003's big failure.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

No injury, and only one bout with the fever/sore throat bug last January and one bladder infection in November. Not bad!

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I didn't actually buy it ... my mother paid for it. But we have a new dining room table with 6 chairs. Nice. Maybe the best thing I bought was Jane Iredale mineral face powder. It costs a fortune, but it doesn't irritate my rosacea.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?Well it certainly wasn't MINE.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

My husband's. He is unable (unwilling?) to understand Emilie's illness, and my depression confounds him as well. My mother's quickness to criticize others was pretty appalling too.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Most of our money goes to the "Kids" category, since we're paying rent and most living expenses for them. The next big chunk goes to our house payment. We also were able to put a sizable amount into savings this year. Yay, us.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

My trip to visit Laura and Melody last January was a high spot, and tailgating always makes me smile.

16. What song will always remind you of 2003?

Probably the Outkast song "Hey Ya", since it never failed to make me smile when I heard it.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. happier or sadder? Sadder

ii. thinner or fatter? Fatter

iii. richer or poorer? Richer

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

Exercising.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Worrying.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

At home with the kids and Jimmy, Brandy, my mother and Kay, Josh and Beth.

22. Did you fall in love in 2003?

Oh no.

23. How many one-night stands?

Ha!

24. What was your favorite TV program?

Survivor, always Survivor

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

No, I don't have much hate in me anymore.

26. What was the best book you read?

I didn't read anything memorable in 2003.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Can't think of any ... oh wait, maybe my huge crush on Justin Timberlake will count for this question. "I don't know what I'm thinkin' 'bout, leavin' here wit chu ..."

28. What did you want and get?

A dining room table? (weird question)

29. What did you want and not get?

Hardwood floors; new living room furniture; new bed? (same weirdness)

30. What was your favorite film of 2003?

I didn't see many, but I loved "Mona Lisa Smile"(that's probably considered a 2004 film) and "The Life of David Gale".

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

44 years old. And I don't remember my birthday very well at all.

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Losing 100 pounds

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2003?

Comfort. Period. I don't own enough pajamas.

34. What kept you sane?My kids.35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I have to choose? Justin Timberlake ... Jessica and Nick ... Dave Matthews ... Josh Groban ... Rupert ... !

36. What political issue stirred you the most?

The war.

37. Who did you miss?

Adam and Emilie.

38. Who was the best new person you met?

Sharon ... she teaches me about perseverance through difficult times.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2003.

I can bear a lot more than I thought. And the support and encouragement I give to my daughter plays a huge role in her ability to cope with her illness.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

"It's hanging on when your heart has had enoughIt's giving more when you feel like giving upI've seen the lightIt's in my daughter's eyes"(Martina McBride sings this beautiful song.)

My New Year Resolutions:

Spend some time outside every day. Read every day. Continue shrinking the credit card debt. Take a walk 3 or 4 times a week. Keep my house in order.

**********

Outside My House Today:

High: 48

Low: 34

Partly cloudy and windy

"We'll drink a cup of kindness ..."

"Every man should be born again on the first day of January. Start with a fresh page. Take up one hole more in the buckle if necessary, or let down one, according to circumstances; but on the first of January let every man gird himself once more, with his face to the front, and take no interest in the things that were and are past." (Henry Ward Beecher)

"Deck us all with Boston Charlie ..."

Hey! Remember me?

Three weeks since I updated here. Hardly even checked my e-mail, so much was going on. There's probably no way I can give a decent recap, so I won't even try. I'll just pick up from here and move on. Fresh starts and all that.

I will tell you this: The last month was THE most stressful month in my almost-45 years. It was impossible to pretend that things were alright, so you have to feel sorry for my holiday houseguests. My Christmas wish was that things would never be that bad ever again.

It was so very good to see my family, but at the same time I was worried about how they must be feeling so uncomfortable with all the stress in the house.

My Christmas gifts (in no particular order):
*down comforter and duvet from my mom
*Nautica cologne, "About Schmidt" dvd, and "Adaptation" dvd from Laura and Melody
*Cup o' drug rep pens, a pretty candle, and a candle holder from Kay
*A framed senior picture of Beth from Beth and Kay
*3 pretty wineglasses (for the 3 Sisters!) and a small winerack from Josh
*Pretty candle holder with good-smelling tealights from Beth*Elton John cd (all his hits!), a dvd set with 3 classic musicals: "Gigi", "An American In Paris" and "My Fair Lady", and pretty coasters from Adam and Brandy
*Blue drinking glasses, a sweet card, and a beautiful framed picture of herself from Emilie
*A big ole box o' money from Jimmy (I have no idea what to spend it on ... leave your suggestion in the "Comments", if you please.)

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Today is my 25th wedding anniversary. That's right. 25 years ago this afternoon ... I was skinny. Waaaaaa!

There will be no celebration ... Jimmy is in Puerto Rico.

However, I will be spending an hour or so this afternoon at a family counseling session. Emilie has been getting some intensive therapy through a "partial hospitalization" over her Christmas break. And today is the day that I get to go in and try really hard not to sob loudly and embarrass the hell out of her.

How I pray that she will find some help and some healing through this program she's in.

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So that's about it. I'm extremely happy to see 2003 out the back door. What a bitch she was.

If you go out tonight, be so very careful of the drunk people careening down the roads, will you?

Happy New Year to you and yours. God bless us, everyone.

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Outside My House Today:
High: 58
Low: 28
Sunny

"You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch ..."

Short hello for this drippy, cold Thursday ...

Today was my yearly check-up ... the doctor very wisely pronounced me "just fine". So there.

Mother and I shopped all afternoon ... 'twas freezing out there but it added to the Christmas feeling.

Also, in case you were wondering ... the job on Tuesday went well! The lady is from New England, and quite the character. I drove her to her lawyer's office so that she could cut her son out of her will (ha!), she treated me to lunch at a Chinese restaurant, we visited the mall, and she did a bit of grocery shopping, and at 5:30 PM I dropped her off at her home. She talked almost constantly, so there was little for me to do except drive the car and listen. I'll go back on Tuesday ... I think she has a salon appointment for a perm. Whoo hoo!

Sleepy already. Please take good care of yourselves. :-)

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Outside My House Today:

High: 35

Low: 31

Icy, rainy, and quite miserably cold!

"You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel ..."

Trip on, trip off. Trip on, trip off. (sigh)

Emilie and I were lured into looking forward to a trip to Puerto Rico after Christmas, and then the Off And On Game began. Jimmy's boss encouraged everyone to have their families join them for part of the holidays, since they will be working so hard they will only be home for a few days. So the planning began. Only flights are hard to come by at this time of year, and timing is everything. I thought that he had given up, and decided we'd just do a trip somewhere fun at a later time ... but tonight he tells me that he's still trying to get us down there for a week.Trip off, trip on!I had already decided that, if the trip was off, Emilie and I would take off on a road trip to Charleston ... maybe Savannah ... and surrounding areas and do some exploring together. Might be even more fun to do that.

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(The dash key is working again.)

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The heater repair guy came to see us today, since the heater blower got noticeably louder yesterday. He videotaped what he found in the basement ... MOLD ... all over the outside of the unit, plus almost totally clogging the air duct thing. It was horrible. $500 horrible for him to clean the damn thing. And that's only a temporary fix. We'll have to get a new heat pump/air conditioner in the spring ... as well as put down a total moisture barrier in the basement. To the tune of $7,000. Merry Christmas!

Oh, and after all that, the blower is still louder. He said the mold growth probably warped the fan blade, and that's why it sounds louder now. Yeah.

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I went out shopping today ... alone! Yay!

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Cooked a nice dinner for Mother and me tonight ... only she feels a little "blah". (sigh, again) I'll be working most of the day tomorrow, so her mood might even be "blah-er" by tomorrow night. Have a holly jolly Christmas!

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And she needs a hearing aid. :-(

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Outside My House Today:
High: 58
Low: 42
Rain, rain, rain

"You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch ..."

Another day of running around town for me and my Mom. We ate lunch out at Fuddruckers, and accomplished quite a lot. Yay, us.

Next project is figuring out how to install the printer on a working computer so that I can print out my little Christmas letter to include with the cards I'm sending. Wish me luck.

Praying that Amazon.com will actually come through for me and send everything before Christmas Eve. I ordered it all on November 30th, and I swear I can't understand why they can't get it all here within a couple of weeks. Grrr.

I hope everybody is doing alright ... and that Clemson exams are going well! :)

(My "dash" key has stopped working!)

Outside My House Today:
High: 56
Low: 27
Sunny

"You really are a heel ..."

We are officially decorated for Christmas at the castle. Today Mother and I pulled out the rest of the boxes of Christmas crap and threw it around everywhere, we hung the wreath, and put the icicle lights out on the deck. We still have a good deal of mess laying around ... hopefully we'll find a place for everything before Christmas day.

I did a lot of wrapping yesterday ... no bows yet, but wrapped. I'm still waiting on several orders to arrive.

Brandy's coming by later to watch the Clemson/USC basketball game with us ... I'm thinking that dinner will be pizza delivery. Easy.

The candles I bought at Pier One smell WONDERFUL!

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Outside My House Today:
High: 45
Low: 31
Sunny and windy

"I'm just bein' honest ..."

OK, that's the last reference I'll make to the ever-popular "Hey Ya" song. Sadly, it's getting old to me.

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Dayummmm, I was gone a long time! And nobody even missed me. Oh well.Let's see ... when we last visited, the Clemson - USC game was about to be played. Happy ...no, THRILLED!... to report that Clemson ate gamecock for dinner that Saturday night. Clemson - 63USC - 17Oh yeah. That's SIXTY three points. I'm figgering it was a disgruntled gamecock fan that STOLE my tiger paw mailbox flag after the game. Grrr. Anyway, Clemson is headed to the Peach Bowl in Atlanta on January 2nd. And I think that's GREAT!

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Hope you all had a lovely Thanksgiving. Ours was ... small. We had good food, and we all took a nap in the afternoon though. (Well, everybody except my Mom.)We were among the insane who went shopping on the day after. Wasn't too bad. I got my last paycheck from the closeout place. And spent half of it in there. Heh.

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Speaking of jobs, I'm "working" again. I got a call today from C0mf0rt K33pers ... they offered me a client who wants someone to drive her to do errands and out to lunch on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I'll start tomorrow, so hopefully things will go well.

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Thanks to the kids, the tree is up already. Mother and I have decided to wait until the weekend to finish the house decorations. We shopped today, and combined with what I did online yesterday, I'm well on my way to being finished. Of course, Amazon's delivery may screw up everything. I figure we have the next 2 weeks to shop, then Emilie will be home and having her wisdom teeth removed. (Awww!) That 3rd week of December, we'll stay close to home and get the baking and candy-making done. Ta-dah! Sounds like a plan.

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Well, that's all I've got, considering I'm so far behind in updating here ... I'll be back soon, I promise.

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Outside My House Today:
High: 69
Low: 36
Sunny

"Swing swing swing from the tangles of my heart ..."

Oh my God! They killed Rupert! You bastards!

I miss him already. At first, I loved him because he reminded me of Hagrid, or Bluto ... "Arrr!" Later on, I loved his incredible ego trip. He was simply the most entertaining Survivor ever. But I was disappointed by his self-pitying final words. I was hoping he would go out with dignity; or if not, that he would crush Jon's head between his beefy, pirate hands after his torch was snuffed. Hopefully he'll reappear on the next Survivor with the rest of the "all stars".

Speaking of Jon ... oh, how I long to smack his crooked teeth right out of his smirking mouth. I hate his stupid wrestling sayings and his lazy, sneaky ways. The sight of his idiot smile when Rupert was voted out caused steam from my ears. Gahhhh! I can't stand him.

AND ... that snake and lizard scene went on FAR too long. It almost made me cry. I was fully expecting to dream about it last night. *shiver*

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So I didn't dream about the snake eating the still-alive lizard. Instead I tossed and turned while visions of Michael Jackson's mugshot danced in my head. Nooooooooo!

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Friday Five

1. List five things you'd like to accomplish by the end of the year.
1. Have a warm family Christmas with everyone feeling contented and happy to be together
2. Lose 20 pounds (chuh-right)
3. Organize the home videos
4. Stress-free Christmas shopping
5. Strip and re-paint the front door (before the Christmas decorations go up!)

2. List five people you've lost contact with that you'd like to hear from again.
1. Leslie White (Adams) (We're "semi" in touch, but I wish it could be like it used to be.)
2. Sheridan Foreman
3. Marie Cope
4. Trina Smith
5. Linda Fehl

3. List five things you'd like to learn how to do.
1. Knit
2. Quilt
3. Play the piano
4. Lay tile
5. Swim

4. List five things you'd do if you won the lottery (no limit).
1. Pay off all the bills and student loans
2. Build an incredible lakefront house on a huge piece of land
3. Build houses on the same land for the whole family (to live in full-time or to use as vacation places ... their choice)
4. Start a computer/drum/counseling/animal rescue/washer repair business, so that my husband and kids could do what they want to all day long
5. Hire a maid! ;-)

5. List five things you do that help you relax.
1. Watch TV
2. Read
3. Listen to Pachelbel's Canon in D or Josh Groban or Sarah McLachlan or Andrea Bocelli or Allison Kraus or Natalie Merchant or Diana Krall or or or
4. Take a shower
5. Call one of my sisters

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Heading off in the morning, destination: Atlanta, to meet Laura and Melody. They are bringing my Mother with them, and I'll bring her home with me for the holidays. :-) She keeps me motivated.

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The 101st game between Clemson and the University of South Carolina Damncocks happens in Columbia tomorrow night; 7:00 PM; ESPN2. Be there, or be left out entirely. GO TIGERS!

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Oh yeah, I'm no longer an overworked, underpaid B1g L0ts employee. I guess you never really thought that one would last either, did you?

Please do not use me as your role model for "work ethic", OK? Thanks.

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Enjoy your weekend ... and if you're in the neighborhood Saturday night, come cheer for the Tigers with me and my Mama!

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A die-hard USC fan and a die-hard Clemson fan are waiting to be executed. The executioner asks the Gamecock fan for his last request.

"Hmmm", he says, then requests to hear the USC fight song one more time.

"OK", says the executioner and turns to the Clemson fan and asks the same question: "What is your last request?"

Without hesitation the Clemson fan says, "Shoot me first!"

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Outside My House Today:
High: 72
Low: 42
Sunny

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Thought For Today:
"I cheer for TWO teams : Clemson ... & whoever's playin' USC."

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Had to come back here this afternoon and add the joke Adam sent me in e-mail today! ...

Four football fans go rock climbing one afternoon, a Clemson fan, a South Carolina fan, a Tennessee fan and a Georgia fan.
They had been arguing all the way up the mountain about who among them was the most "die hard" fan.

Upon reaching the top of the mountain, the Tennessee fan proclaimed to the other three "This is for the Volunteers!" and promptly threw himself off the mountain as a form of sacrifice screaming "Rocky Top" as he fell to his death.

Not to be out done by the Tennessee fan, the Georgia fan jumped up and shouted "This is for the DAWGS" and threw himself off the mountain barking "Woof...woof, woof, woof, woof!" as he crashed on the rocks below.

Refusing to be out done by the Tennessee and Georgia fans, the Clemson fan rose to his feet and yelled at the top of his lungs "This is for the CLEMSON TIGERS!" and without any hesitation, pushed the South Carolina fan off the mountain shouting "Fly now, Gamecock!"

Ha!

I just got back from the grocery store. I bought Corona Light and limes for tomorrow evening's bratwurst dinner. Planned to buy the DVD about the rivalry between Clemson and USC, but it was sold out at that particular store. Wondering now whether it might be worth checking out a few more stores.

First I have to make "Clemson Caviar" so it can sit in the fridge overnight before we eat it with our Fritos tomorrow. ;-)

Bye!

"It's my life, don't you forget ..."

Well. I worked today with a sore arm and numb fingers. They called us all together at lunchtime to make a "We're In The Home Stretch" speech. We were told that, starting tomorrow, we would be working 12-hour shifts ... including Saturday, possibly Sunday. Anyone who has a problem with the schedule should "hit the door". Cashier training will be Monday and Tuesday of next week, for 8 hours a day. Then we're expected to put in 4 hours at the new store. Grand Opening is set for the day before Thanksgiving.

I have to say that "discouraged" is putting it mildly. I know how I feel after 10 hours on my feet, and it makes me cry like a baby to imagine 12 hours. All afternoon, my head was full of all kinds of thoughts and ideas. And I honestly don't know what the hell. :-(

I'm so damn tired of dealing with the inability to make money AND keep a semi-happy mindset at the same time. There must be something wrong with me.

Of course, most of the people I work with are thrilled at the idea of 12-hour-days ... they work to pay their rent and buy cigarettes. At $6.50 an hour, it just feels like insanity to me. Why am I knocking myself out for a chance to work for this crappy company?

Maybe the company I worked with before B1g L0ts will find me another old person to take care of. They still consider me an employee ... I told them I was unavailable to work through the holidays. Don't know why I did that ... I guess just in case this job sucked really bad. Anyway, all it would take is a phone call and they'd put me back active. I can't even tell you how much I hate all of this.

Ahhh ... cry me a river, right?

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Q: Why do USC alumni keep their diplomas on their dash boards?
A: So they can park in the handicapped spaces.

Q: How do you keep a a Gamecock busy?
A: Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.

A drunk stood on a table at a noisy bar.
"Listen up, y'all," he shouted. "I want to tell a Carolina joke." Immediately, a man -- a big man, a 6-foot-5, 270-pound man -- got to his feet.
"Buddy, let me warn you", he told the drunk. "I played football at Carolina."
"No problem", said the drunk. "I plan to tell it real slow."

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Outside My House Today:
High: 69
Low: 57
Rainy and windy

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Thought For Today:
"You might be a Gamecock if:
Your elective foreign language in college was English."

"So why you, why you, why you, why you, why you ..."

As completely exhausted as I am tonight ... and I am, completely exhausted ... I can't help but perk up a bit when I hear that "Hey Ya" song, which I love so much that I ... must ... shake it like a Polaroid pic-cha! SHAKE IT! SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE IT! Ahem.

Oh Lord, my kids are both rolling their eyes as they read that. Heh.

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I hurt myself at work today ... my elbow bent the wrong way when I was trying to lift something far too heavy, far too high. Duh. Nobody cared much. But it made me cry ... more out of being too tired than anything else. And I was really trying hard NOT to cry at work. I stayed an hour and a half longer than I said I was. Duh again. THAT won't be happening tomorrow. 8 hours, maybe 8-and-a-half ... then I'm out of there.

I'm thinking that if the cashier training doesn't happen soon, I won't be able to hang in there. This physical crap is killing me. :-(

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Already getting fired up for this weekend's game between Clemson and University of South Carolina. In preparation, I think I'll share a few jokes that Adam sent to me in e-mail.

Q: What do you have if three Gamecocks are buried up to their necks in cement?
A: Not enough cement.

Q: What does an average Gamecock football player get on his SATs?
A: Drool.

Q. What do you call a Gamecock in a 3 piece suit?
A. The defendant.

Q: How many USC freshmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None - it's a sophomore course.

Haha ... more tomorrow. :-)

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Outside My House Today:
High: 73
Low: 56
Cloudy

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Thought For Today:
"You might be a Gamecock if:
Your Gamecock vanity plates were made by your ex-roommate."

"Where are you going, with your long face pulling down? ..."

I was on my feet for 10 hours today. I can't even express how glad I will be when the store finally opens. The gave us the option of leaving after 10 hours, or staying for 12 hours ... you know I was out the door lickety split.

My friend, the banker lady, was offered a promotion today. I was really happy for her. She'll be a "Customer Service Specialist", and hopefully she'll get a raise too. But that means that we won't be working together anymore until after the store opens. :-(

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Jimmy is safe and sound in Puerto Rico, after a very fast pitstop at home this weekend.

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Lawd, I'm tired. Hope you're all doing well ... keep in touch!

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Outside My House Today:
High: 68
Low: 60
Gray and misty

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Thought For Today:
"From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put." (Sir Winston Churchill)

"Let's rewrite an ending that fits ..."

7 AM - Woke up,in spite of intentions to "sleep in"

9 AM - Called my mother, made plans to bring her here for Thanksgiving ... probably will drive down to get her a week from today

11 AM - Called Kay, griped at her about not letting me know they weren't coming here for Thanksgiving ... will miss her and the kids very much

Noonish - Started cleaning bathrooms

1 PM - Listened to the Clemson/Duke game on the radio ... final score: Clemson - 40, Duke - 7 ...oh yeah

3 PM - The cleaning goes on and on ... clean sheets, clean floors, clean toilets

5 PM - Talked to Laura on the phone ... crossing my fingers she gets her promotion next week

6 PM - Surprise visit by Emilie and Judd ... they were in town shopping, and caught me in all my cleaning crud ...didn't care because I was so happy to see her :-)

Now it's time for a quick shower before picking Jimmy up from the airport at 8. He's heading out tomorrow afternoon for Puerto Rico.

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Outside My House Today:
High: 60
Low: 43
Cloudy

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Thought For Today:
"Indecision is my only flaw, I think ..."

"What would you say? ..."

Ahhhh ... Two days ahead of me to recover from The Week That Was. And to prepare for The Week To Come. They warned us today to plan on at least 10-hour-days next week.

I think one of the things I will "do for myself" with my paycheck is to have a manicure after the store finally opens. My nails have never looked so bad.

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Friday Five

1. Using one adjective, describe your current living space. Quiet

2. Using two adjectives, describe your current employer. Reasonable, Funny

3. Using three adjectives, describe your favorite hobby/pasttime. Relaxing, Lazy, Stress-reducing

4. Using four adjectives, describe your typical day. Achey, Dirty, Busy, Underpaid

5. Using five adjectives, describe your ideal life. Fulfilled, Happy, Healthy, Funny, Long

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"Survivor" ... I hope Rupert can continue to win immunity since they're already gunning for him. And shame on Darrah and Tijuana for voting against Ryan.

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Clemson plays Duke tomorrow in Death Valley ... as far as I can tell, there is no TV coverage. Another afternoon in front of the radio for me. Adam and Brandy are going to the game, haven't heard if Emilie plans to or not.

Go Tigers!

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Time to start the relaxing ... I'll check in tomorrow to let you know how it's going. :-)

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Outside My House Today:
High: 59
Low: 37 ("Freeze Warning", my butt)
Sunny

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Thought For Today:
"TGIF!"

"Mine is not the first heart broken, my eyes are not the first to cry ..."

Better today, thanks.

I think I tried really hard to pace myself so that I wouldn't be out of steam by 1 PM. And being encouraged by my daughter didn't hurt either. :-) (Thanks, Emilie.)

There was still plenty of moving things around ... today it was millions of glittery Christmas ornaments. The managers just couldn't make up their little minds where they wanted them. Grrr.

Oh yeah, tomorrow's Friday. That always helps.

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Adam came by for a quick moment this evening to pick up his bongos, on his way to a friend's house to rehearse with the same friend's band. He couldn't help but comment on the mountain of leaves one must plow through to get to our front door. It's pretty funny. If I leave them until Jimmy gets home again, they'll be waist-deep.

Anyway, was nice to hug my kid. As always. :-)

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How 'bout this weather? I think our neighbor's tree was blown down today ... when I came home from work, it was lying across the road. I'm assuming they didn't cut it down and let it fall that way. Just glad it wasn't one of ours.

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"Survivor" tonight ... hoping it's Jon the Weasel's night to go. Sad to think that, sooner or later, we'll be watching Rupert's torch go out.

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I think that's about all I've got for today. Sleep tight.

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Outside My House Today:
High: 68 (around 4 AM)
Low: 45 (right now)
B-b-b-blustery! ... with a freeze warning for tonight

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Thought For Today:
"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."

"She works hard for the money ..."

You came to the right place if you're in the mood to listen to some complaining.

I'm tired. No, really ... so very tired. The heavy shelves, the boxes that eat my cuticles, the rugs that weigh more than I do ... oh, and I almost forgot the walking. The never-ending walking. We put things on the shelves, only to be told an hour later that the shelves are 3 inches too high and everything needs to be redone. We unload trucks and price every single piece of merchandise at breakneck speed, only to be told that we need to be faster. We're told we can go home "when the work is done". It's all completely demoralizing.

It seems that everyone there is feeling quite discouraged and worked to death. I feel so sorry for the tiny lady that hangs out with me ... her 53rd birthday is Friday, and due to a divorce and some crazy bad luck, she is working at B1g L0ts after spending 18 years as an assistant bank manager. She says she couldn't find work in any Greenville bank! Today we both admitted to each other that we go home and cry every day after work. At least I'm not alone.

I keep telling myself that it will all be over soon ... the store is supposed to open on Nov. 24th. Although I overheard the district manager today saying he doubted that we'd be ready. If they'd hire some people who KNOW how to set a store up, I bet it'd be done a whole lot faster.

I just don't know how many more days of this I have in me.

As Laura likes to say, "Call 1-800-WaaWaaWaa-WaaWaaWaaWaa."

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Love you guys. :-)

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Outside My House Today:
High: 71
Low: 39
Sunny and breezy

"If I could turn back time ..."

Yes, it was the best weekend I've had in a long while. Sunday wasn't so hot, but Saturday more than made up for it.

Friday improved when we were able to leave work just before 2PM. I shopped for tailgating supplies, helped Brandy get her car from the shop, and baked some brownies. Laura arrived about 10PM, and we opened a bottle of champagne to celebrate seeing each other again. I probably talked her left ear off before we went to bed.

Saturday morning, we got moving and actually left for Clemson a little ahead of schedule. We were able to visit with Emilie and her roommates for about an hour ... very enjoyable. Loved seeing the pictures from Em's 21st birthday party!

We were on campus just before noon ... with nothing ahead but lots of yakking, cocktails, snacks, and people-watching for several hours. Brandy and Adam were fun companions, as usual. We pondered the wisdom of buying a couple of $45 tickets, but decided that since there was NO CHANCE of Clemson beating Florida State, we'd rather just sit under the night sky and listen to the game on the radio. It'd give us more time together, too. We're so smart!

The kids all left for the game by 6:30, and by 8:30 Laura and I were wondering whether we had made a bad decision by letting those tickets go. After all, Clemson had already scored 2 field goals! By half-time it was obvious that the Tigers were dominating the game, and it was also just as obvious that Laura and Dawn were dumbasses for not buying those tickets. D'oh!

Long story short ... a miracle occurred on Saturday night in Clemson, SC. Ranked 3rd in the nation, the Florida State Seminoles lost to the Clemson Tigers!

Clemson - 26
Florida St. - 10

*huge smile* So very exciting, and so very wonderful! It made for a late night, but was worth every minute of it.

Laura left just after noon on Sunday, and I watched Lifetime movies all afternoon. Zzzz.

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Two truckloads were unloaded, priced, and shelved at work today. Most of us were sent home early (2:30 instead of 4:30), and you know that was alright with me.

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And now the laundry awaits. Y'all have a good night tonight, and a beautiful Tuesday, will you?

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Outside My House Today:
High: 57
Low: 37
Sunny

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Thought For Today:
"Love is or it ain't. Thin love ain't no love at all" (Toni Morrison)

"Doctor, doctor won't you please prescribe me somethin' ..."

So tired. Feet hurt.

Hair looks like crap. Hands look like crap. The weather is crap. Managers are crap.

At least it's time for "Survivor".

And tomorrow's FRIDAY! :-)

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Outside My House Today:
High: 81
Low: 69
Pouring rain on the way to work, then cloudy

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Thought For Today:
"Every problem has a gift for you in its hands." (Richard Bach)

"I get knocked down, but I get up again ..."

Whoa baby. I spent this entire day building that heavy-ass Sauder furniture --- microwave carts, bookshelves, etc. I had no idea I'd spend the day in the furniture warehouse, but that's the way it turned out. There were about 6 of us, all women. We hefted boxes, stacked tables, chairs, and bed frames. I'm insanely tired and achey now, and hoping that I get to stick price tags on toilet paper tomorrow.

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I dreamed last night that I ate half my cell phone. I was talking on it ... but taking bites, chewing, and swallowing the bottom half of the phone the entire time. In my dream, I realized that I had ruined it only after half the phone was gone. Sheesh. No wonder I'm fat.

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Have y'all watched that MTV show on Tuesday nights after "The Real World"? It's called "Rich Girls". The cameras follow Tommy Hilfiger's teenage daughter Ally and her best friend, Jaime, as they go about the business of being 17, filthy rich, and SO very spoiled.

There. Are. No. Words. Rich people who are THAT rich ... well, they're just crazy as loons. They wipe their butts with dollar bills. And they need serious therapy.

Makes me miss Nick and Jessica.

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Outside My House Today:
High: 79
Low: 67
Partly cloudy, and humid as hell

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Thought For Today:
"If you hold on tight to what you think is your thing, you may find you're missing all the rest. (Dave Matthews Band)

"Turn around and you’re tiny, turn around and you’re grown ..."

Time doesn't simply fly. Time climbs into the cockpit of a supersonic jetplane ... and when you're not paying attention, it flies at five times the speed of sound. I'm never more aware of that fact than when another "My Baby's Birthday" rolls around.

Especially when it's one of the big birthdays, like this one is.

All I know is this -- one minute you're trying to squeeze a wiggly toddler into her footie pajamas ... the next minute, you're watching her build a Science Fair solar cooker out of a cardboard box and plastic wrap ... the next minute, you're wishing her a Happy 21st Birthday from 50 miles away.

And that's what I'm doing today. Wherever you are and whatever you're doing, Emilie Elizabeth ... I'm wishing you a happy 21st Birthday. And a healthy 21st Birthday, and a safe and peaceful 21st Birthday, and a memorable 21st birthday, and (most importantly) a 21st Birthday filled with people telling you how wonderful and special and incredibly precious you are.

Beginning with your Mom.

I love you baby girl. Always.

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Thought For Today:


Where are you going my little one, little one
Where are you going my baby, my own
Turn around and you’re two, turn around and you’re four
Turn around and you’re a young girl going out of the door

Where are you going my little one, little one
Dirndls and petticoats, where have you gone
Turn around and you’re tiny, turn around and you’re grown
Turn around and you’re a young wife with babes of your own

"I go crazy ..."

Monday. Exhausted.

Jimmy was leaving on a jetplane by 5:30 AM, and I was at work at 7 AM. They had precious little for us to do today, so we had to spend hours "looking busy", which was a load of crap. The trucks won't arrive with merchandise until Wednesday morning, so they offered a day off tomorrow to all who were willing to work on Saturday instead. No way, Jose. I gots tailgating planned on Saturday.

So anyway, I guess tomorrow will be spent "looking busy" again ... probably a lot of cleaning bathrooms and the like. Cross your fingers that they will send us home early. Wednesday's gonna be a bitch.

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We had a few trick-or-treaters on Friday night ... most were scared away by our fanatical neighbors down in the cul-de-sac. They blasted Christian rock and preaching from sundown until after 9 PM. I wonder how many souls they saved. Grrrrr.

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Saturday, my mother-in-law visited for 2 hours ... after hitching a ride up here with a trucker friend.

So that was fun. :-/

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And we're not even going to discuss the Clemson/Wake Forest game. We're not.

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Sunday, Jimmy and I drove down to Clemson to hug our almost-birthday girl and take her to lunch. Don't know about the two of them, but I enjoyed every minute of it. We gave Em her birthday goodies, such as they were ... and bought her a few items of Clemson apparel from the shops downtown. (Cute hat!)

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I've been going to bed SO early ... this manual labor crap really tires this old fat lady OUT. I'll probably watch "All My Children" at 8:00 on SoapNet tonight, and it'll be lights out right after that. Zzzzz.

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So excited about the coming weekend ... Laura and Melody are driving up from GA to spend Saturday at the Clemson/Florida State game with me and the kids. Hopefully they'll arrive Friday night ... fun will be had by all! :-)

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OK, I'm in need of soap and shampoo. See you tomorrow.

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Outside My House Today:
High: 79
Low: 49
Sunny
(Meteorologist John Cessarich promises that this WILL be changing soon ... thank ya Jesus. November should be "crisp".)

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Thought For Today:
"Stay tuned. I could say something brilliant at any moment."